It’s infuriating that so many businesses offer free meals to kids for their birthday. Is turning 7 years old really an accomplishment worthy of free food? No way. Turning 30 and not having any kids of your own is an actual accomplishment that should be celebrated with a free feast. Unfortunately, there aren’t that many birthday freebies for single slobs like me. I navigated the sloppy seas and found the best birthday freebies for slobs. Most of these birthday freebies require you to join some sort of digital fan club so links are included. This is your plan of action to have the ultimate slob birthday for free. Put on your favorite eating shirt and let’s get started.
Your first stop on the slob express should be for coffee. A birthday boy needs his morning jolt to handle the busy day ahead. Dunkin Donuts, Krispy Kreme, and Starbucks will all give you free coffee for your birthday if you sign up for their fan clubs. Lots of local shops will give you free coffee too so you may want to ask about birthday freebies next time you’re in your favorite shop. Personally, I’ve always preferred free stuff from giant corporations over people with a independent business. The perceived social justice of getting something free from a giant corporation makes the coffee taste that much better.
They say that breakfast is the most important meal of the day, but what about for the person on-the-go? We went to three top fast food chains to discover where to find the best drive-thru breakfast in America.
Director: Cassandra Lee Hamilton
Music: Cowabunga Babes
Earlier today, Amazon took the wraps off Prime Music, a new addition to the company’s Prime subscription service. It’s best known for free two-day shipping and Netflix- style video streaming (which now includes a ton of HBO content), but Music adds an important component: music!
In other words, for an annual charge of $99, you can now stream unlimited, commercial- free tunes just about anywhere. Prime Music is available via your PC, your Roku box, your Kindle Fire, your Android and iOS devices, and so on.
Let’s go to the calculator, shall we?
With only five shopping days left until Father’s Day, it’s time to make a decision on what to get for dear old Dad. A necktie? Fail. A new drill? There’s nothing wrong with the old one. No, if you want a happy dad this Sunday, there’s only one way to go: gadgets.
Dad loves ‘em, and there are plenty of cool new toys out there that won’t break the budget. Here’s my list of five can’t-miss picks for Father’s Day.
Bluetooth speakers are awesome, but most of them are boring-looking plastic bricks. The BlueSync WUD, on the other hand, is all cool and retro–just like Dad. Encased in wood and styled like a 50s radio, it sports a big volume knob and even a carrying strap across the top. Vintage, baby!
Corporate marketing stunts have ruined The Guinness Book Of World Records. I came to this realization after hearing about Arby’s marketing stunt where they filmed a brisket being smoked for 13 hours and played it in its entirety as a commercial in Duluth, Minnesota. This marketing stunt won them the World Record for The Longest TV Commercial, and it really pissed me off.
I think I have a right to be upset. I’ve always held the Guinness Book Of World Records in high esteem. The latest edition was a guaranteed Christmas present in my household. I would spend hours reading about all of the weird and incredible things that people around the world could achieve and dreaming of one day having my name in that book. As far as I was concerned, holding a Guinness World Record was better than getting a Nobel Prize. You saved a bunch of sick kids with your dumb vaccine? Who cares! Come back to me after you’ve been growing your finger nails for 20 years or you learn to squirt milk from your eyes. Then I’ll be impressed.