Kimye. Kamberly. Whatever you refer to them as, the fact is that they exist.
Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s love story is a tale as old as 2012. Now we’re lucky to be alive to be witness to their wedding, or at least witness to the blogs that will be covering the wedding, an event that is shaping up to be one of the most extravagant celebrations of love and excess and love of excess.
We already know a few details of their special day. Let’s review:
As you may have heard, today marks “the end” for Windows XP, arguably the single most popular version of Microsoft’s long-running operating system. (And by “popular” I mean “least hated.” This is Windows we’re talking about, after all.)
But what does that really mean? Just because Microsoft is pulling the plug, now you have to go buy a whole new computer? And is Windows 8 so incredibly bad that you’re better off buying a Mac?
First things first: Don’t panic. (It worked for Arthur Dent, it’ll work for you.) Instead, read on to learn three essential facts about Windows XP’s demise.
Most folks hemorrhage money whenever they visit the degenerate’s paradise that is Las Vegas. Those folks, however, are suckers. It’s totally possible to enjoy yourself in Sin City without losing your shirt—all you’ve gotta do is bet on the right bargains. Gettin’ a room, gettin’ drunk, gettin’ full, gettin’ entertained and comin’ back with a little something to remember your trip by is what Vegas is all about. In this video, we’ll show you how to do just that and more, for little to no cashola! You feelin’ lucky?
We’ve all been there. You really did mean to go grocery shopping this week—you even made a list. But then, it just didn’t happen. So there you are, staring at a near-empty fridge, debating picking up the phone and ordering take-out.
DON’T DO IT!
Instead, have a wander over to your pantry, and you’ll discover that therein lays a world of culinary opportunities. All you need is a little creativity and some super-basic techniques, and you’ll be chowing down on some really good (and-much-cheaper-than-takeout) grub. Here’s what to have on hand:
The average Jane Six-Pack out there would be rightly confused by the idea that Dow Chemical Co. is just as much of a person as she is. It makes a little more sense when you consider that “corporate personhood”-related Supreme Court decisions like Citizens United were decided by a bunch of lawyers, pretty much the furthest thing from a Jane Six-Pack — unless you mean a six-pack of Coke. Sure, corporations are people to a bunch of lawyers, because it’s the shortest possible contortion of logic that gets us to a point where we can grant corporations legal rights, describe their liability or lack thereof, and allow them to own things.
But when corporations assert that they believe things, corporate personhood gets sketchy. At best, corporations’ expressions of “belief” place them among the worst hypocrites out there, and at worst, their glaring inconsistencies threaten to break apart any notion of their personhood altogether.
I’m a pretty skeptical gal, especially when it comes to door-to-door salespeople. You could say that door-to-door sales are a dying art, and sometimes I kind of wish it would do just that- die. With all of the online shopping options out there, why would people still go door-to-door and try to convince you to buy something you could buy from literally anywhere, without ever having to talk to a customer service rep? Seems desperate. Also, it’s 2014, why would I, a girl basically living alone in the big city with no one to protect me but my dog, Jan, opt to answer the door for a total stranger? Seems dangerous. He could be the next Zodiac Killer! But for some reason, on a fateful sunny Thursday afternoon, I decided to let Daniel in- not quite into my home, but into my heart.
One thing I know is that everybody needs Netflix. And Amazon Instant Video. And HBO Go. Maybe Hulu Plus and Crackle.
What I don’t know is which media-streaming box I should invite into my home to deliver all these awesome services. I guess you could say I’m feeling…boxed in.
Thank you, thank you, I’m here all week.
Yesterday, Amazon hopped on the set-top box bandwagon with the Fire TV, an Apple TV/Roku competitor with a few neat tricks up its sleeve–and an eyebrow-raising price. More on that in a minute.
Lifehacks are supposed to make your life easier, but do they really? Hi, I’m Josh Androsky, and I’m here to find out. Also, I am very bad at doing things (anything, really). So if I can do a lifehack, then you can be sure you will be able to, too. For this lifehack, I went to Reddit, with a shout out to u/bakedbananas for the idea. If everything goes right, I’ll be able to turn a bottle of Grey Goose Vodka, that I would usually recycle, into a cool free glass!
You’re a man, busy doing things like biting the caps off of beer bottles and serenading ladies on the street with the ancient Hymn of the Cat Call. With a hectic schedule like that, how can you possibly be bothered with shopping for essential man-stuff? Okay but what if your mom is busy? Right, exactly. That is the premise of Men’s online subscription services. Dedicated to finding the easiest way for you to man it up, they take any and all pesky work on your part out of the equation. So what kinds of things are readily available from your fingertips to your doorstep?
Razors – The internet is VERY concerned with making sure men are shaving. If you haven’t already created an artisan straight razor out of a vintage bike tire and are still going the cartridge route, there options for you. Number one, because it is the easiest to remember, is Dollar Shave Club, which offers three choices of blades in $1, $3 and $9 a month options. Once a month, DSC sends you the razors, and has upgrade options to include a shaving butter, which makes sense for synergy, and pre-moistened peppermint scented toilet paper called One Wipe Charlies, which makes no sense and sort of freaks me out when I think about the men who need that on a monthly subscription.
Knock-off brands always make me laugh. I’m not sure why they’re so amusing. I guess it’s because knock-off brands have that desperate quality about them. Was it Judy Garland or Jeff Bezos who has that oft repeated quote: “Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second-rate version of someone else”? Knock-off brands strive only to be a second-rate version and that disparity between what they want to be and what they actually are is always good for a few chuckles.
Knock-off brands typically present themselves as less-expensive alternatives to the brand you actually want. These are great options when you’re shopping on a budget. For example, Mountain Lightning from Wal-Mart is half the price of Mountain Dew. If you’re going to be buying gross green soda, why pay full price just for the brand name? Although for the dollars you save, you end up paying more when you factor in “explaining to visitors that Mountain Lightning is basically the same thing as Mountain Dew.” Still, these can be great alternatives and by the way, as far as weather events happening on mountains, lightning is way cooler than dew.
As a former connoisseur of return fraud, (emphasis on former, OK?) I am intimately aware of the return policies of many of the chain retailers cluttering America’s once-breathtaking landscape. Some, of course, are better than others. Pretty much all of them are better than Best Buy’s, which is god-awful. (That’s right, Best Buy! I’m callin’ you out!) The ones in this article, as I’m sure you’ve already gathered by the title, rank among the best. It’s hard to find satisfaction in this world, especially when it comes to interacting with big box retailers, but these faceless corporations are A-ok in my book.
As a peddler of wares for the upper class, it stands to reason that Nordstrom should have the Rolls-Royce of return policies. And boy, do they. Their official policy is, well, that there isn’t one. Which means you can return items years after you’ve bought them—hell, even after you’ve worn them. Which, naturally, makes Nordstrom a hotbed for fraudulent activity. A friend of mine’s mother, who used to work there, has horror stories about gritting her teeth and taking back used underwear. (The customer’s always right, after all!) If anything you buy at Nordie’s “malfunctions” (up to and including flip flops that fell apart after a summer or eight), you can bring it back for a refund. You don’t even need a receipt, just the tag from the item you purchased. Now, before you go hog-wild and return every single thing you’ve ever bought at Nordstrom, know this—returns negatively affect the commissions of the employees who accept ‘em. So have a heart. Please?
Before this, various Comedy Central shows had their own apps, but most of them (like The Colbert Report’s) let you watch only clips. Now you can see the latest episodes of over a dozen shows, in their entirety, the day after they air.
In other words, at long last, you can stream last night’s “Daily Show” on the train ride to work. In your face, boredom! (Just try to keep the laughter down. Some of us have work to do.)
Retail therapy is a real thing as proven by science. In a study conducted by researchers from the University of Michigan it was found that shopping is more than brief escapism. It does genuinely make you a happier person. They write in their findings, published in the Journal of Consumer Psychology, “Our experiments provided support for the notion that making shopping choices helps to restore a sense of personal control over one’s environment, and thus helps to alleviate sadness.”
I used to be the type that would spend big bucks on a new clothes and gadgets whenever I got bad news, or felt a little bit off on a certain day. However, after depleting the little money I had, I knew I would need to change my impulsive, frivolous lifestyle. The problem is, since I can’t afford real therapy, retail therapy is the only form of therapy I have. So instead of ditching it entirely, I decided to keep up with my frivolous lifestyle, but on a smaller scale. Instead of buying a new dress for $60, I now go to my local CVS and buy the most expensive dish soap in stock.
A common conundrum for the foodie on a tight budget is the issue of health vs. cost. Sure, free-range, organic chicken breasts are better for you (and tastier) than hot dogs, but money is tight and that ish is expensive.
I don’t like to play that game though. For my money, I’ll take real, high-quality, inexpensive protein that is versatile, easy to find, and delicious. Enter the incredible, edible (yeah, I went there) egg.
Perhaps best known for their presence in all things breakfast, eggs are actually ideal for meals spanning the day. And for between $2.50 and $4.50 for 12 of them, they’re a heck of a deal. By making eggs the star of plate, you’ll find that you can indeed afford nutritious, protein-packed meals that satisfy your palate and keep you full for hours. Read on for 10 affordable and sexy egg-based meal ideas:
To walk into a coffee shop and be told “We’re cash only,” is irksome for a number of reasons: the clerk tends to say it as though the company had been born that way or something. As though there’s an all-powerful god of payment forms, and we must do his bidding.
It’s not divine will. It’s a shortsighted business decision by often distrustful or resentful business owners. Contrary to popular belief, operating as a cash-only business is neither profitable for companies, nor beneficial for anyone in the grand scheme of things. (OK, a few companies can benefit but the way they go about it is not nice.) Here’s why it’s so bad, and what recourse you have, and in order to explain it all, I may have to bust a couple myths along the way.