All I DON'T Want for Christmas

Lately we've been posting a number of holiday gift ideas posts: top electronics gifts, beauty gift sets, wine gift ideas and even ways to give and be green.

Today's post, however, is on what NOT to give.  Columnist Amy Dickinson has been posting a list of gifting faux pas on Twitter which inspired me to poll my Savings.com co-workers on their holiday horror stories to come up with some ideas to remove from your holiday shopping lists.

Most unwanted holiday gifts fall into three categories:  one is "practical," the next is "useless" and the last is "Huh?"

It can be tough to come up with a great gift idea, but while a useful gift may seem like the way to go more often than not it's not. 

Said Lia:

For me the worst gift were mats for my car! Who does that? I think you shouldn't give that as a gift on purpose and seems kind of rude.

Katie's boyfriend may not have intended the not so subtle message sent with his practical gift choice, but that's not how it was received:

I got a dental whitening kit from a boyfriend once and couldn't stop looking at my teeth for days, asking passersby: "Do my teeth look yellow to you?" We broke up shortly thereafter and I smiled a big, whiter smile.

Pity poor Jacob S. who suffered his parents practicality while other kids were delighting in their toys and games:

Growing up, I used to only get school supplies for Christmas...to keep me focused on--yup, school.

Chris' pain stems from his philanthropically-inspired Mom:

My mom likes to donate to a charity for me in lieu of giving me a gift.  I know that makes me sound terrible--but I hate that "gift."  She doesn't even ask me which charity I would want to support.

But it's Kip's Mom that takes the practical gift to a whole new level:

One year when my brothers and I were high school aged my mother put condoms in our stockings. I guess that was her way of encouraging us to be responsible adolescents. It really freaked us out, especially my younger brother as his girlfriend was present when we opened gifts. I think he might have been upset for years over that.

The next type of gift to avoid is "useless." Useless describes gifts that simply don't fit--whether literally or figuratively--the recipient. As in Lindsay's case:

I'm really small (one of the smallest in my family) and while growing up, every single year my grandmother used to buy me pajamas big enough to fit an ogre. There are multiple pictures of me wearing pajama pants that literally would come up to my neck. Thank goodness Grandma always included the receipt.

Guy offers up the typical ugly sweater story:

My horror story is pretty boring and standard. A well meaning Aunt once gave me a sweater that I suppose she thought was hip and happening. I smiled, said I loved it, and proceeded to put the knit sweater with the light up Christmas tree pattern directly at the bottom of my closet.

Joe G., one the other hand, has a bit of a twist on the ugly sweater story:

This isn't really a horror story, but it's a family tradition in my house that my dad, my brother, and I go to Wal-Mart on Christmas Eve and buy my 94 year-old grandmother the ugliest piece of clothing we can find. Usually it's a bedazzled Christmas sweater.  Then we give it to my grandmother and say it's from my brother-in-law.  Inevitably, she thinks it's beautiful. 

Erika's useless gift is one that should resonate with many:

Potpourri. I HATE potpourri and there was a friend years ago that somehow misinterpreted my hatred. These items were not even re-gifted--they went straight to the trash!!!

Okay, Erika--calm down and step away from the potpourri! Actually, it's hard not to empathize with her. What the heck is potpourri anyway? The word actually derives from the French phrase for "rotten pot."

Lovely.

Pete's gift horror story may not stack up against a bag of fragrant wood chips, but it still qualifies as "not quite a fit" nonetheless:

I love my wife to death and she has the best gift giving intentions but she is notorious for disappointing me on Christmas day.  One year she gave me a gift certificate to go sailing on a World Cup racing yacht two hours away in San Diego.  I know that sounds great, but I grew up in a sailing town where my friends invited me sailing all the time.  So why do I want to drive four hours to get on a boat with a bunch of tourists?  And if anything, why do I want to be on a world cup boat as a civilian?  It would be like driving in the back seat of a Ferrari.  If I am going to be on a 10 meter racing yacht I want to sail the damn thing not get thrown up on by some guy that just came from sea world. 

Last but not least, are the "Huh?" gifts.  These are gift that leave the recipient scratching their heading and wondering what kind of drugs the giver was on when they decided on what to give you and why the heck they just didn't gift you with whatever it was they were smoking instead.

Holly had two such horror stories:

A used teddy bear--you could really tell--and a strange aquarium like thing from a local pharmacy store like CVS. It was about the size of a shoebox. The walls were cheap mirrors, and inside were a few small, ugly cactus plants. No matter where I put it, it made the whole room look junky and gross. So then I threw it away...THEN the person who got it for me happened to notice it was missing and got very offended.

Katie's "Huh?" gifts: 

Once, I got a dolphin sculpture with a missing tail that someone told me I could glue back on and it would "work just fine."  Repair glue not included...Also, I would say don't give gifts that the airlines deem a "fire hazard." I tried to take home a creepy oil lava lamp thing once and suddenly I was a terrorist threat. I was thinking of dumping it in the garbage outside the entrance, but my family was watching and waving from the car.

Craig gives Katie a run for her money with his story:

My Dad bought me a pair of loafers two years ago. Now, I am not one to ever wear loafers if I can avoid them but one night I was wearing flip flops when we decided to go to a nice bar in San Diego. This particular bar did not allow flips, but I remembered that the loafers were still in their box in the trunk of my car so I went out there to put them on.  What I didn't realize was that they were both left footed. I had to walk around all night at this sweet club with two left footed loafers on my feet.  Nice Xmas gift Dad, thanks!

Sheryl sums up the reason for many ill-fitting gifts thusly:

Nearly every gift I get goes straight into the give-away bag for my next trip to the Salvation Army.  Pardon the bah humbug, but I think most people give gifts THEY'D like, rather than think about what the recipient might actually like.

Amen to that!

To prevent from being the sad recipient of a gift gone bad, check out Sara's tip for ensuring all your gifts are exactly the right fit.  And to make sure you're not the clueless giver, remember:  Walk the fine line between too practical and totally useless and re-gift with care!

Have a gifting horror story to share?  Vent your spleen in the comments below--that's what we're here for!