Herding Cats: Laser Pointers, Explosive Materials and Terror Alerts

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A woman survives off water for three weeks, the U.S. decides to move away from terror alerts that make as much sense as Twister,  a San Diego Serbian is arrested for having the biggest explosive stockpile in US history, and some poor redneck faces a felony charge for blinding a helicopter pilot with his laser pointer. Happy Thanksgiving? USA Today: Elderly French woman trapped in bathroom for 3 weeks  - An unfortunate French lady was trapped in her bathroom for three weeks. Apparently unable to get out the door or window, she resorted to banging on shower pipes in an effort to draw attention. She did. But her neighbors thought it was her repairing her flat, so instead of calling for help they were organizing a petition to enjoin her from continuing the improvements that made so much noise. If that doesn’t suck, surviving off warm water for three weeks would. Props to her–I didn’t know that was even possible.

The Ledger: Deputies: Laser Aimed at Copter Gets Lakeland Man Arrested – This man wins the stupidity award for intentionally blinding a sheriff’s helicopter pilot with a laser pointer while the helicopter was circling the neighborhood. Apparently annoyed by the noise and/or lights, the man decided it would be a great idea to shine his laser pointer into the cockpit. This rendered the nightvision temporarily inoperable, which is bad news for a helicopter flying at night. He’s charged with the third-degree felony of “misuse of a laser lighting device.” What?

CNN: Police: Second explosive found in record cache in San Diego County – A naturalized U.S. citizen from Serbia has been arrested for having the largest homemade bomb factory in America in history. Jakubec had PETN, a favorite of Al-Qaeda, and HTMD, an extremely volatile chemical, cluttered around his house. Also inside the Escondido house were items suggestive of armed robberies. While it’s uncertain why he had so many explosive materials, we can all rest easy knowing that the judge still granted him the option of bail at $5 million. Just so we’re clear: largest cache of homemade explosives in US history = you still get bail. Word, America.

Business Insider: Pro-Google Vigilantes Throw Eggs At Houses That Opt Out Of Street View – This might be too far, Google fanatics. Homes who chose to opt out of Street View and have their houses blurred were egged by non-Google affiliated civilians, who apparently don’t like the fact that they can no longer stalk random people and plan their burglaries. Attached to the eggs are notes reading “Google’s cool.” I hope they’re well-funded if they plan on carrying on.

New York Times: U.S. to Drop Color-Coded Terror Alerts – The Bush administration’s color-coded terror alerts are going bye-bye because Homeland Security has grown tired of Twister and Star Trek jokes. The system never actually provided any information on what different threat levels meant, and what the public should do for each threat level. Homeland Security is debating on what to implement in its place. I say at least numbered levels. Or just stick with traffic colors. America: Go, slow, stop. Done.

Moneyning.com: Can We Agree Money Is Important? – On a more serious note, we need to all agree that money is quite important. Even though it can be a touchy subject seemingly beaten to death with constant chatter and vexations, money really defines the opportunities and quality of life we’ll experience. So while I’m not advocating greed, I am advocating spending wisely. Check out our Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals!

That’s it for this week. I must say that for a short work week there is some rather odd and disturbing news. Best of luck to all you shoppers!

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