Seth Barnes

This St. Patrick’s Day, Don’t Lose Your Green to SUI

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Written By:

Seth
On St. Patrick’s Day, revelers will take to neighborhood parades, pubs, and house parties to raise a few glasses with family and friends. But don’t toast just yet- for thousands of people, waking up on March 18th will bring with it the realization that their financial standing is toast. The culprit? Shopping Under The Influence. 
Most people will commit Shopping Under The Influence, or SUI, at some point in their lives. Simply put, SUI occurs when purchasing anything under the influence of mind-altering chemicals—a situation that occurs far more frequently than you might realize in our constantly connected world. Have you ever booked a flight online over morning coffee, or bought shoes on your iPad while cradling a glass of wine? Ever bought an app on your phone when your house has a carbon monoxide leak? Then you’ve shopped under the influence.

Savings.com Announces $125 Ad Buy During Puppy Bowl X

Written By:

Seth
LOS ANGELES – Refusing to be priced out of the year’s biggest day of television watching, Los Angeles-based coupon and deal site Savings.com announced today that they will spend upwards of $125 advertising their Twitter feed during Puppy Bowl X, the counter-programming phenomenon running concurrent to Sunday’s Super Bowl.
“We’re in the game!” exulted Seth Barnes who works in marketing for Savings.com. “Granted it’s the day’s second biggest event and we’ll be advertising on the proverbial second screen, but doggone it we’re ready to play ball!”

10 Items Men Cannot Be Trusted To Buy At The Grocery Store

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Written By:

Seth

The modern grocery store is a hive of commerce, a 24/7 Superstore selling everything imaginable with almost limitless selection across product categories. Need aluminum foil? Prepare to sort through a spectrum of options starting with the store brand and ending with a technological wonder that could serve as a heat shield for a spacecraft reentering Earth’s atmosphere. In short, the grocery store is the last place you should send the average American male, provided you actually want the items on his list.

Calling out gender differences certainly isn’t in vogue these days, and as a Dad and husband, I’m hesitant to criticize my own species. But this missive is a cry for help. Based on personal experience, I know no matter how hard I try, I cannot be trusted to accurately buy the items below, most likely due to an evolutionary quirk among my ancestors that makes me blind to the difference between tins of anchovies and sardines displayed in close proximity to each other.

By admitting defeat and articulating the shame I feel about being so massively distracted while food shopping, I’m hoping we can take the first step towards creating a different world for my son to grow up in. A world where he doesn’t have a panic attack standing in front of a towering shelf of pickle spears. Please have compassion for us. For we are just men.

Pardon Me, Let’s Put A Turkey Into Outer Space

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Written By:

Seth
An Open Letter To The Aerospace Community:

I am writing on behalf of Savings.com, a coupon and deal website that helps people save money at thousands of retailers. In these economic times, while we’re focused more than ever on helping consumers save at their favorite stores, it’s come to our attention that another American institution may need saving: the Thanksgiving turkey pardoned each year by the President of The United States.

Eight months before Black Friday, Couple is first in line

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Written By:

Seth

LOS ANGELES – Citing an unquenchable desire to get the best holiday deals, Los Angeles couple Finn and Laurie Thompson secured the first spot in line for Black Friday at an area Best Buy. Despite the fact that the annual day of discounting is nearly eight months away, the Thompsons were inspired by “HolidApril,” a concept put forth by coupon site Savings.com suggesting that the 2013 holiday shopping season should and would start immediately after Easter.

The Thompsons exuded messianic certainty that living outside a big box store in a tent was the only reliable way to secure access to the best deals. “When I’m on my deathbed and somebody asks ‘Did you do everything in your power to get 80% off a 56′ Panasonic TC-PVT50 HD 1080p UberPlasma TV’ I want to the answer to be yes,” stammered an emotional Finn Thompson. “Plus last year I tore my ACL rib-kicking the gentleman in front of me when the doors opened, and our health insurance doesn’t cover injuries to the extremities.”

Introducing HolidApril: Get a jump on your holiday shopping

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Written By:

Seth

April is the cruelest month. But there’s no reason it can’t be the jolliest! One consistent piece of feedback we’ve been gotten from our audience is that the holiday shopping season is WAY too short. Why confine such a festive and relaxing occasion to just one month a year? Our Savings Scientists looked into the matter and the bubbling solution they concocted in our state-of-the-art Deal Lab is finally ready for public consumption. We’re proud to present HolidApril!

So get your bells on, spike up a big batch of eggnog, unsheathe your credit card, and get ready to sing some Fa La Las. Because we’re going to teach you about the 268 days of Christmas. You’re welcome.

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